Witnessing My Fate

Witnessing My Fate

2005 was the year I will never forget. It was one that was filled with devastating news that would change me forever. After getting a call from my mom explaining that she had been diagnosed with hepatitis C and the doctors were recommending her family also be tested.

Shock Followed by Fear and Anger

I was 35 years old, a business owner with two children under 10 years of age.  My life was going full steam ahead.  This caught me off guard. After going into my family doctor to have the test he came back into my room and quietly said “Kim, you are hep C positive”. At that moment I do not recall anything else he was saying. My mind and hearing clouded over. It was like an out of the body moment. My mind was numb, I had no idea what was happening. Driving home I pulled over to the side of the road and had a moment of outburst. The tears, the anger, the fear, everything poured from my body at once. Back in 2005, that was not a diagnosis anyone wanted to get handed to them as it carried a death sentence.  Megan (my daughter) and Garrett (my son) were all I was thinking of.  Oh my gosh, I passed this horrible disease on to them. I cried and cried. I pleaded with God. Why? Please don’t let them have this, Please!

My children were now my priority, my concern. I just prayed and prayed they were not infected. The day we got them tested and results showed they were NEGATIVE, was the best day of my life. I was so thankful and relieved that I did not pass this on to them. There is, however, a slight risk of mother-child transmission during birth.

Watching Hep C Take Its Toll Is Incredibly Hard

After a few days, we learned that only my mother and I had contracted this disease through a blood transfusion at my birth. My mother, Bonnie, was the first kidney transplant (1965) to give birth after her transplant to me (1968). It was during this birth that both of us had contracted hepatitis C, through a blood transfusion given to us both.

The rest of 2005 was met with my mother’s health deteriorating rapidly. She was in end-stage liver failure, she was facing the magnitude of health-related issues cause by hepatitis C. It was not till later in my fight did I fully understand all her health issues came back to the root cause…Hep C. The more I read about the disease the more I completely understood the impact hepatitis C can destroy the full body. I watched my own fate first hand seeing her suffer and fighting to live.

Going over to help her was difficult for me.  Not that I didn’t want to spend every moment with her, but knowing I, too, had this horrible disease. I feared for my children having to witness my slow painful death as well. No child should have to go through this.

May 5, 2006 was the day I lost my friend, my mother.  It was the day I began a deep depression and stopped living to think of my future.  Everything in my life stopped that day. I went through the motions of being a mother, wife, business owner but I stopped living.

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The HepatitisC.net team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

Comments

Poll