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Emotional Outbursts with Liver Disease

People with bad livers aren’t the only ones who face moments of frustration and irritability; It is part of life for everyone. However, having a compensated liver adds a layer of brain fog, hepatic encephalopathy, etc… Don’t get me wrong, having liver disease does not give you a pass to be a grumpy person all the time, but I get it if you are.

We all have those bad days…

I had a rough week with stress from my job and trying to manage and multitask at work I became rather “scratchy”, I will say, another word for sarcastic, grumpy, and not so nice of a person. Feeling unheard and the lack of anyone at work trying to understand my inability to perform each day at top notch, I became rather brass. I know you are thinking “Kim, that is just not you”.  Well, yes, it was me that week. As embarrassed as I am to admit it, I am here to say that it happens to the best of us.  Not everyone wants to be irritated and take out frustrations on others, but it happens.

My mood was so foul that I didn’t even like myself this week. On the brink of tears each minute with that nerve spilt wide open for everyone to poke, I hit my limit. With a meltdown in the privacy of my car, I let out a scream. A scream of desperation and just wanting to be understood.

The dangers of bottling it up

I am normally pretty smiley and love to compliment and encourage others daily, but this week, it took all I had to be at work. I felt beat up on and like I was being degraded. Was that really the case? Probably not, but it sure felt like it at the time. Me releasing that burst of anger and emotion in my car really triggered in me that I need to vent more. So I had that one-on-one with myself and let these pinned-up emotions out. I am not one to blurt out what is wrong with me, so I bottle them up. The weather has been gross out (cold, gloomy) and that affects my muscle and joint pain, so add that to the mental things going on, it was a recipe for an internal explosion.

Getting through it

After I was able to have a good scream and some tears shed, I felt better. It did not solve my pain physically, but it helps clear out the bottled, pinned-up emotions.

It is ok to have moments of explosions. In fact, everything I read says it is normal.  What I am here to share is make sure these moments of outburst are ALONE somewhere where you do not attack another person or harm them with words you can’t take back. Get a journal and write feelings down. Then go back when you are feeling good and see how you felt and how your dealt with it. Next time a situation arises and you are about to explode, it will help you know what worked last time.

But please, do not take these emotions out om your family or your loved ones as they are not meant to be your lashing post. They are your support and love you.  They want to help trust me but maybe do not know what you need. So be kind and remove yourself to a place you are alone in the explosion. When you are done, return back to the family a new better version of you.

In the end, please know that you are not alone. I get it.

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The HepatitisC.net team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

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