The Hardest Symptom of Hepatitis C: Depression
Shortly after my diagnosis, I sank into a deep depression. I was in a very dark place. I would not eat, my emotions all over the board, and I did not do much except sit in my own little world. I began to remove myself from friends, family, and my kids. I would go to work and to my kids' functions, I but not engage in conversations with other parents or socialize. I went to be there for my kids and my kids alone. Nothing else mattered.
Acknowledging my depression
I feared what others were saying about me. If I went anywhere, I heard giggles and whispers and sank farther and farther into depression. All of this really was not taking place, but in my own world, at the time, it felt so real. I cannot explain when it clicked for me. One day, I sat in bed, feeling sorry for myself, hearing my kids in the other room laughing and playing around. I sat up, and it was as if my mom (who passed away from hep C ) was talking to me. I heard noticeably clear words saying, "Kim, this is not how you are to be living your life. You get up and fight!"
The mindset needed to fight hep C
From that moment, I have never looked back. I never have let another negative thought enter my mind. After failing one treatment and then failing to get in two trials... I continued that fight. I could have easily sunk back into a feel sorry for myself pity party, but I refused. There is no room in this fight for negative. No negative thoughts, no negative people surrounding you- I mean NOTHING. You get off that couch and do whatever it takes to get to that finish line. I say this not to be harsh, but as a friend picking you up to your feet again. I care and you are not alone
All those people I thought were laughing at me were not; I had created this all in my own head. Do not allow anything to stop you from curing. Surround yourself with positive, uplifting people that support your fight. Believe in your cure.
Getting help
Sure, I have days my whole body hurts, and I cry and get frustrated, but there is a huge difference. Now, I get it out of my system. I do not remain there. Let's face it, our lives are surrounded with ugly news on TV and radio. We need that place to fall and others get it. Places such as hepatitisc.net is that place where you can find comfort and understanding.
If you try my recommendations and you still are struggling, I want you to promise me that you will search out medical help. There may be medications available to help you. It does not mean you will be on it forever, but just to help you over this bump in your road. Whatever way you choose, do not give up. You are a fighter and you CAN beat this. Do not let a diagnosis define you.
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